It took me sometime to realize how antiquated a picture I was painting every time I said, ‘I don’t do Facebook.’ So when I recently admitted to this social solecism confirming my archaic character to a new acquaintance it was the shock on the man’s face which finally registered the extent of what I had casually declared. A lot fit into place. Like why two of my friends have since a year refused to have anything to do with me and the decline in respect from a few professional contacts who had otherwise thought reasonably well of me.
Some months ago when a colleague had given me a lecture on how I would never rise in the world because I was not connected to this celebrated, greatest, most wonderful of social forums I thought she was exaggerating. But now I am fast beginning to realise that success in any professional endeavour would always evade me if I continue to stay away from this most haunted meeting place of everyone who is or isn’t anyone in the current social realm.
But stubborn as I am, I refuse to ‘join in’ and accept the invitations that keep popping up on my email. The hope though that there are others like me is fast diminishing. All my friends, colleagues, relatives, in-laws and now even my husband has joined the gang. The only one I know who isn’t a part of it are my over 70 parents – even some of their friends are on it!
I am wondering whether this confirms that I am a snob or does it mean that I don’t have the social grace to be a part of ‘acceptable’ society? I had thought that ‘following the Jones’’ was a habit of the bourgeoisie, never to be taken up by anyone who had the slightest claim on having a good upbringing. But my socially/politically/environmentally correct 18-year-old daughter berates my anti-bourgeoisie belief saying that such a notion is based on discriminating values which runs down lesser mortals. But I DON’T run down any mortal. I just prefer to stay away from most!
For the few uninitiated – not that I believe there are any – Facebook is a social utility (website) that connects people with friends and others who work, study and live around them. In further simple English it means that everyone whom you know or don’t know, or whom your friends know or don’t know, or whom your friends or you would want to know or even not want to know may be encountered on Facebook
To me this simply translates into an uncontrolled social orgy. Facebookites – if I may call them so – claim that it keeps them in touch with friends. In touch? They are actually living in each others’ bedrooms, peeping into their closet full of pictures and seeing what they are up to every moment of the day! And never has the old adage of ‘familiarity breeds contempt’ been truer than with the Facebookites. I have seen best friends split because of crazy messages posted on each other’s ‘Wall which everyone’s Facebook profile carries. Someone writes something about someone else’s friend which in turn is viewed by someone’s friend who tells someone what someone has written about him/her and there goes one nasty fight open for EVERYONE to view.
If you think reading this is confusing think how confusing and convoluted so much virtual scribbling actually is. Old fashioned I may be but I’d rather meet up with people I like once in a while and have a healthy meaningful discussion occasionally than prying into what they ate for breakfast everyday or which social gathering they went to. The socialite magazines provide enough of that nonsense!
Already, the art of conversation has nearly died with emails and text messaging but with social web portals like Facebook and previously Orkut the social graces of public behaviour have become more obsolete. Granted that internet and mobile phone technology has simplified life hugely, but being stuck to a machine to the extent of ignoring your immediate surroundings and even family members cannot be deemed healthy by any standards.
I know of one middle-aged man who had to be rushed to the hospital with near kidney failure because he was glued to a virtual chat room for 36 hours without taking a bathroom break! That might be a one-off incident but it definitely reeks of unhealthy tendencies emanating from ‘virtual’ chatting habits.
Incidentally, Facebook tendered an apology recently to its users for creating confusion over the privacy of their content. There was some kind of suspicion over privacy of users' content uploaded on Facebook which was raised after the company changed the language in its 'Terms of Service' , stating that even after users leave Facebook, others would be able to access their information and content like photos and messages. So when Facebook was celebrating its fifth birthday in February its founder and chief executive officer Mark Zuckerberg was tendering an apology to its users saying that the new terms were “a mistake that we have now corrected. You own the information you put on Facebook and you control what happens to it. We are sorry for the confusion.”
But how far can one protect information put in a place that is run by people whom no one has ever seen? And more to the point, why impart with private information on public forums anyway?
But mine is probably a lone voice criticizing such forums. As far as I know, everyone from Obama to an obscure school kid is on Facebook and having a whale of a time. Infact, on Obama’s website there are thank you notes to visitors and supporters acknowledging how Facebookites contributed to the
So while I remain stubbornly obsolete about joining the Facebook crowd and jeopardizing my own social standing – now publicly – I presume others are sniggering at my lack of ‘internet graces’ and are smug about their own higher social standing. How long I hold out I don’t know but I will definitely exercise my parental right on my soon to be teenaged son for as long as my “because I say so” has the power to terrorize!
No comments:
Post a Comment